inhale. exhale. inhale. exhale.

things are nuts right now.

layla's results came back normal from the ultrasound!!!!!!! we were of course ecstatic about that. i'm not sure i could have managed if that had not been the case.

the good news and her first birthday were somewhat overshadowed by the news that my dad's colon cancer had spread to the lymph nodes. the cancer is in stage 3. he was just released from the hospital today and is now recovering at home for the next 4 weeks. he will start chemo once he has recovered from the surgery. we are hopeful that he can fight through this.

i'm just trying to remember to breathe and take it one day at a time.

we've been up in orange county for the past week and will be leaving again on friday, so i have lots to do! i'm hoping to put up some pictures soon. as well as a couple of posts that i have drafted, but that are not complete. i'll try to work on those tomorrow.

for tonight...there is this song. i heard it for the first time on the way to layla's first doctor appointment about the lump i found in her breast. then i heard it while i was driving her to children's hospital for the ultrasound. i also heard it the morning i was driving to the hospital for my dad's surgery. and then that night as i left the hospital at 9:30pm after finding out his cancer had spread. i'm not really sure how i'm going through all of this without kevin here. but, i am. i know it wouldn't necessarily be easier if he were here. but, i could occasionally fall apart and he could help pick me back up. and that's just not an option at this point.

i love you baby (because i know you're reading this, even if you NEVER comment :))